The anger just blinds me, and I lose control. It’s about me, and I need to fix myself before I ruin this relationship. Sometimes I get really jealous, and I understand that it’s not your problem. I just want to be the best version of myself for you.
Apparently, sometime I think too much and it makes everything worse. When I’m with you, I’m trying so hard not to screw things up. I don’t think that I deserve your forgiveness, but I will hate myself if don’t try at least. I know I messed up big time, but I love you more than anything in the world and I can’t imagine my life without you. I’m incredibly sorry for this, and I will do anything to fix things. I can’t believe I made you feel this way. Just the thought of hurting you makes me feel sick. But it doesn’t mean that it’s okay to hurt each other. We’re learning to compromise, overcoming difficulties and growing together spiritually. Sometimes my stupid mistakes prevent me from doing that, but I’m trying really hard for you, baby. All I want is to make you feel safe and loved. My most important goal in life is to make you happy. I promise that I will work on that, and I promise to never go back on that promise. I’m not trying to justify myself, sometimes I just cannot control what I say. I’ll do anything to be a better person for you. It hurts me to know that I made you feel bad. I have never thought that I’m capable of such a thing. I took a moment to reflect on myself, and I fully admit that what I did was not okay. Your ability to set boundaries and stand up for yourself helped me to realise that I was wrong. You’re the strongest woman I’ve ever known. I can’t stop thinking about how foolish I was, and I can’t believe that my childishness resulted in losing the best thing I’ve ever had. I’m so sorry. People don’t appreciate what they have until they’ve lost it. How could I be so foolish and insensitive? The last thing I want to do is hurt you, but this stupid inability to control my anger messes with my head every single time. All I can do is hope that you will understand and forgive me. I’m trying to be more empathetic and I’m getting better at it, but I need some time to get to your level. You’ve given me so many second chances, it’s embarrassing to admit. I just realized that what I did was stupid and not okay. You know that I’m not the smartest guy on Earth, especially when it comes to understanding someone’s feelings.
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